It Ain’t Easy Being Green

“Nobody appreciates Celery,” the leafy green stalk moped. “I have many qualities, you know. I’m good in a salad, and soup. I go well with peanut butter, but all you ever hear is 95% water.” His voice became a high pitched whine at the end.

“95% hot air, if you ask me,” Cauliflower muttered. Carrot sniggered in the corner.

Celery rounded on them both. “You’re 92% Cauli! And you look like Broccoli that time he fell in the cheese sauce, so don’t you get smart with me!”

“Hey,” Broccoli said, waddling over. “Calm down, Cel. We’re all Vegebros here. Let’s remember that.”

“Ha! Veges? I’ll tell you what, when Tomato sorts out his identity crisis and picks a damn side, then I’ll calm down.”

“It’s not my fault!” Tomato cried, blushing. “Mom was Vege, Dad was Fruit. How am I supposed to know what I am?”

“Tom can’t help that his dad was Fruit,” Broccoli said in a soothing tone. “That’s not important here.”

“Not important?” Celery squawked. “Tomato get’s preference on all the salads, and the sandwiches, and he’s not even one of us. What do I get? Health food diets, that’s what. The guy looks like a clown’s nose for mayo’s sake.”

“That’s it. I’m joining the Berries. Screw you guys.” Tomato sniffed, turning redder, and bounced away.

Broccoli scowled and turned back to Celery. “Now look what you’ve done. Are you happy now, Cel?”

Celery huffed and looked away, fronds curled over one another. “Wasn’t my fault,” he sniffed. “Tom’s just a show off. He’ll be back, you see. Next fad diet comes through and he’ll be back.”

“Oi, Broc!” Cauliflower called. “We’re up. It’s dinner time at the kiddies table. Let’s go scare the little boogers.” Cauliflower pulled his best ugly face and raced off.

“I have to go to work,” Broccoli said with a resigned sigh. “Just promise me you’ll behave.”

“Wait. You’re leaving me here with him?” Celery spared a quick glance into the corner where Carrot sat waiting. The orange one’s narrow eyes and broad grin looked back. “You know what he does, right?”

“You’ll be fine,” Broccoli said, patting Celery on the shoulder. “I hear there’s a soup coming up tomorrow night.”

Broccoli waddled off and Celery tried to follow. The fridge door closed, cutting him off. Swallowing, he took a step back and turned to face Carrot. The corner was empty. Celery spun around and jumped when he saw Carrot right behind him.

“H-hi Carrot. So, soup tomorrow? Should be fun, right?”

Carrot grinned. “Yes. Fun. But first, let’s see just how much water you’re really made of.”


FFM Day 1

Prompt: Celery


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